Ever notice how limited we are as related to our wisdom, strength, endurance, patience, etc. when left to our own inadequacies? I mean, the characteristics I just listed are desired by just about everyone and many people believe that they are fully equipped in them right up until the point that they are truly tested. We can be cruising along fully self-sufficient until pressed by circumstances that may be immediate and temporary or could have built up over a period of time. In any case, until we are pressed; I mean really pressed, then the illusion of control is intact and thriving.
So when we get thrown a curveball that is out of our control we have a choice to make with regard to how we respond. We either decide that we were never really in control to begin with and probably never will be or fight like crazy to keep things moving in a direction of our choosing (thus, “controlled” outcomes). The option is always ours but the choice is not quite that simple.
If we act to maintain our position of perceived capability it doesn’t make us any more in control of anything and all we are really doing is postponing the eventual decision to lay down our ego and insecurities (the two being more closely related than we usually consider) through the next set of circumstances or the one after that, or the next one . . . etc. Or we can perish through the self-destruction of a life lived to maintain safe barriers and mechanisms that prevent others from getting into our inner circle of self-preservation.
If we are facing difficulty and press through it with our eyes on Truth to evaluate our weaknesses then we have a chance at avoiding a do-over in that particular area of challenge. If we short-cut our way through based on lies, insecurities, fear and laziness then there is a great chance we’ll repeat the same patterns that allowed the issue to begin with and it will be manifested in another way at some point down the road.
A marriage relationship is a great picture of this truth. I was once told that the best way to work on our marriage was to work on ourselves. When we face the challenges that come with living in close proximity to another person, there are bound to be irritants, offenses and challenges. If we stay focused on everything the other person could or should do to change, then there is a stale-mate. If we question why it bothers us in the first place, then we can start to gain peace through getting to knowing who our Source is and recognizing that if we are our own source then the limitations are paralyzing. When we are limited to own insecurities, this is not an easy proposition but when we decide that we are second to Another, we can take on the task of laying down our self every day and walking out of the situation with Grace and Victory through humility and surrender.